As most of my friends will know, I develop obsessions easily. In fact, it can take a mere 45 minutes with a human being for me to fall madly in love... . (Of course, it's never real. It fades. When it doesn't, that's when I know he/she/it/that is a Lifer.) Casablancas is what I like to call an adopted obsession. Because credit has to be given where credit is due: Anna 'T. Pain' Wiesen. Little sis' was all over The Strokes at the tender age of 13, when I was convinced that big arena rock/hip hop acts were where it was At--- see Incubus, and/or Jay-Z. However, there's nothing that reminds me of my first love more than 'Between Love and Hate' from Room on Fire. All this nostalgia led me to google countless photos of the one and only Julian. Needless to say, my obsession has kicked into high gear. If I can't be with him, I'll just BE him.
So my tomboy side will come out for a little while. I will start walking/talking/drinking like a guy- or more specifically like Julian. Is this a relevant topic for all you people? Probably not. But maybe I'm not the only one. Maybe there are countless others out there who suffer from what I call 'permanent-obsession-disorder'.
Sometimes I worry about this. It's creepy, I know. (As always, my mind oscillates between worrying about Kazakhstan's use of child labour in the cotton industry, which is seriously troubling, and I'll be writing a post about it soon, and my own neuroses). It's just that I find all different types of human beings so deeply inspiring. It's the only thing that keeps a cynic like me going. Here are some key words that mark the obsessions I've had over the years: wood/south/poets/north/deathly thin/homey. Shit, son. These men and women have helped construct the person I am now. It's why I'm such a contradiction, but also never afraid to admit it. There's something really important about how syncretic personalities are. Though, I don't think there's anything so awesomely unique about anyone- attributes have come from SOMEWHERE. But the way it all comes together- like a kaleidoscope- ya. It's brilliant. But moreso, I need to leave the West. I enjoy transnational frames of mind that bind young people from Toronto to New York to London, Berlin and Stockholm. But I also know that Marcuse would shake his head at me. I know that the vacuousness of my surroundings are only accessible because someone else is suffering. It's a mind-fuck. Sorry...but it is. And I can't see. So I'll be peacing out to meet more interesting minds very soon. Once I make some money, and once I spend some time with loved ones. Once I shake off this Masters degree for a while. (Oh, right I haven't graduated yet.)
But still.... my obsessive personality will never change.
I know it's not fair or overly creative to pick someone who is already in the public eye, and decide, oh hey, they're really awesome, I want to know what the essence of their Being is all about. But people do it all the time. W.W.J.D.? W.W.O.D? (Obama). And now, in my case, W.W.Julian.D? He would make a new album!
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Photo illustration by Williams and Hirakawa
2 comments:
You are my hero.
haha. You are MY hero. Where would my daydreams be without him?
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